The Q Family Blog » Family

Prayer Request

Jamie — Thu, 29 Jul 2010 21:08:14 +0000

My brother, Paul, received some bad news yesterday. He does a job that requires a lot of manual labor and it’s taken a toll on his body, especially as he’s aged. He’s had some injuries and dealt with some back problems. However, his most recent back issues have been causing him extra problems like occasional numbness in his hands. So had a MRI and got the results yesterday. I don’t understand everything exactly, but the MRI showed his lower back bones as black on the scan when they’re supposed to be white. Apparently this means that those bones don’t have marrow. So they’re damaged. The doctor told Paul it’s usually hereditary but no one in our family has had anything like that. May be I’m the closest since leukemia deals with bone marrow. He’s getting cortisone shots for the pain and will start PT in order to try to help the issue. He’s had PT in the past and it helped. Hopefully this path will be his remedy because the next step is surgery and that’s scary. It could be dangerous and usually metal rods are inserted which will seriously hinder his mobility. My brother is, of course, upset. He worried about his job and being a provider for his two girls. It’s all new so he deserves a couple of days to be sad, but then I know he’ll be strong. I ask for those who read my blog to pray for him and his family. He’s a good father and this is definitely going to be difficult. Thank you.

Daddy-less Weekend

Jamie — Tue, 18 May 2010 12:46:12 +0000

This past weekend Joel went to Miami for a photography workshop; he returned energized and appeared to have a productive and fun experience. While he was gone, Mommy, Jacob, and Grandma played. I left Joshua out because unfortunately he was pretty fussy all weekend. He had drainage issue (probably due to allegeries) and cried quite a bit. It wasn’t that bad, but he wasn’t the most fun child to be around. Jacob…. he got spoiled. I got him McDonald’s Saturday for lunch and even I partook for the first time in months. They were so busy; it had to be fresh. The fries were pretty good, but I can’t say it’s the greatest food. I think it tasted better in my fantasies. We also watched movies, did a craft, worked on his Bible verses and speech exercises, had pizza, ate ice cream… we did fun stuff. Jacob was good for most of the weekend, and only really frustrated me once when he wouldn’t do anything but was “bored.” In the end, it was a fun weekend but exhausting!

Mother’s Day

Jamie — Tue, 11 May 2010 12:23:20 +0000

It was nice to be home for Mother’s Day. The day didn’t start beautifully. Josh’s morning screams triggered a headache that required me to take an oxycontin and take a nap. Luckily, it worked and by 11AM I was feeling groggy but better.

For my gift, Joel and the boys gave me stackable mother’s rings. I love them! One ring is for Jacob with his birthstone and birth date, and the other is for Joshua.

I gave mom a mother’s ring too. I gave her one years ago with birthstones for me, Paul, and Reg. With this ring, I wanted to add all the grandchildren. It was difficult to find one that would accommodate everyone, but I finally found one. The large stone is for mom, and I put everyone else in order based on birth date. So it goes: me, Paul, Reg, Casey, Jacob, Scarlett, Joshua. I put the ring in the plastic canvas box that I made in Tampa. Oh, and for fun, I got mom a flying pig with actual battery-powered wings.

Joel and Jake took me out to lunch at Duffy’s. It was my idea because I got an email that said mothers eat free on Mother’s Day. I had some yummy beer-battered shrimp. Jake was really good; the placemat was a huge asset. He colored, played tic-tac-toe, and did the maze on his matt and mine.

We went to Lidia’s later that afternoon to celebrate. Angel grilled. Mami made black beans. I handled dessert. It was a pretty good evening until Joshua decided that it was time to leave. We did leave after his normal bedtime, so his fussiness wasn’t unexpected. We got him home, bathed him, and he went down without a problem.

Completed Homemade Door Signs

Jamie — Mon, 03 May 2010 05:01:21 +0000

I’ve been working on special door signs for Jacob and Joshua’s rooms since my time in the Tampa apartment. I had hoped to finish them before leaving – nope. Then, I wanted to get them done by Easter – nope. But this last Friday, completion and I think they look great. They’re the most detailed items that I’ve made out of plastic canvas. I think my characters and animals look really good. It was incredibly time consuming, but I am definitely pleased. Plus, I think they mounted well on the doors. It’s a great personal touch to their rooms, and I made it so I can change out the pictures and because the main characters hang, I can change them by making new ones as the boys get older.

As a bonus, Jacob seemed to like his sign when he got home from school. That made me a proud mommy.

We’ll Miss You, Tigger-Bob

Jamie — Sat, 01 May 2010 23:35:08 +0000

It wasn’t that long ago that our beloved Whiskers sadly passed away, and now her “brother” (in spirit, not blood) has gone to join her. Tigger has had problems for a while. Shortly after I ended up in the hospital this passed June, Tigger had a life and death episode involving his bladder and urinary tract. We shelled out a small fortune to save him and since then, we’ve had him on a special diet and had to monitor him closely for urinary problems. He spent tons of time sleeping in his cat bed. He would still occasionally crawl into Joel’s lap for some love, but he kept mostly to himself.

A little over a week ago, Joel noticed that Tigger was acting lethargic and called me over after putting Jacob to bed. Tigger was acting slow and not walking very well. Joel had also noticed that he looked large and bloated on his sides, and we automatically presumed he was once again experiencing the urinary problem(which we were told could return). Cats are really good at hiding pain and usually by the time you notice a change in behavior, it’s very late.

Joel called our vet, but he said he was too far away and that Joel should take Tigger to an emergency clinic in Boynton. However, Joel went online and found an emergency clinic closer to home, so he took Tigger there. Before they left, I sat down next him, petted him, and told him that I loved him and that he was a good cat. He still had the same baby face from his youth; somehow his head always seemed to stay the same – even while his body went through a Garfield phase. It truly was sad. I think both Joel and I knew that he probably wouldn’t be coming home.

We were right about Tigger not coming home, but we were wrong about why. At the clinic, Joel agreed to do an x-ray and the results were unexpected. Tigger had just been to the vet in March and nothing like this was detected. What the vet found were masses in Tigger’s liver, pancreas, and possibly his lungs, not a blockage in his urinary tract. The vet told Joel that it was most likely an acute cancer, probably lymphoma. Shock. They didn’t do blood tests; it just seemed unnecessary. There was nothing really to be done except say good-bye. Joel told me that he held Tigger in his lap and watched him go to sleep from the injection that ended his life. I know that must have been so hard. It was definitely a sad homecoming for Joel as he had to tell me what occurred. We cried for the loss, but we both knew if was for the best.

In fact, we really know it was for the best. Joel dropped the x-rays off at our vet’s office and he called Joel back later and apologized for our loss and for not noticing anything wrong with Tigger in March (but who knows, there may not have been anything to really detect). He also said that the masses were too much and there truly was nothing to be done for him except what we did. I think that made Joel feel at least a little better.

I had to leave for Tampa the next day, but that Saturday, I worked on making something to remember Tigger.

When Whisker died, it was at home, so Joel made her a wooden box, and Jake and I made a collage of pictures and words that we placed on the inside cover. We buried her in our back yard and planted a plant above the grave. Since Tigger passed at the vet’s, there wasn’t a body to build a box for so instead, we got a little box that I decorated and put pictures of Tigger in. Today we buried it next to Whiskers.

For me, it was very appropriate. Tigger and Whiskers grew up together; Joel and I adopted Whiskers in 1996 and Tigger in 1998 after we lost Jasmine to an unfortunate detergent accident, and they passed on in 2009 and 2010. I think they had a special bond even though they fought at times; it was all in love. I always smiled when I would catch them cleaning each other; it was such an intimate and loving act — and then Tigger would hit Whiskers in the face with his paw! He was super mischievous in his youth.

So now, we’re left with Oslo. We adopted him on a whim and had learned that having three cats was more than what we bargained for, but both Joel and I are now glad we got him. The boys love him. He’s really their cat. Os lets the boys rough house with him and does nothing. Joshua will pull his whiskers; Jacob, his tail, and Oslo just stares at them pleased with the attention. Joel even taught him how to shake hands. Sometimes he’s more like a loyal dog than the usual, independent cat.

We won’t be getting another cat, at least not for now. First, Joel and I really aren’t ready for another pet. Plus, my BMT doctor told me that I could keep the pets I already had, but that I shouldn’t get any new ones.

For now, Jacob knows that both Whiskers and Tigger are in heaven and that Oslo is still here to play with him. Time will heal, and we’ll always have our memories.

Rest in Peace, Tigger. We will always love you.

Missing my aunt

Joel — Wed, 03 Mar 2010 03:52:27 +0000

My aunt Gloria, or Tia Gloria as I called her (Tia is aunt in Spanish), passed away Monday at her home. She was my mom’s older sister and only sibling living in the states. Mom is doing okay at the moment, but I know this is really hard on her; they were very close.

The two of them were so alike, yet so different. They were kind of the antithesis of each other; a yin and a yang, carefully placed on Earth by God to provide balance. They both have been loving moms who share similar family values and have raised multiple kids and spoiled numerous grandchildren. However, Mom has always been the careful one who worries about absolutely EVERYTHING and is easily embarrassed. Tia Gloria, on the other hand, loved to play pranks and was more of a risk taker.

(Left) Tia Gloria; (Right) Mom -- Cuba Circa 1950's

Not to mention she could cook some mean cuban food. Mom can cook, but even she had proclaimed Tia Gloria’s cooking superior to hers. “I don’t understand what she does to make the food taste so good” she’s said many times.

As kids, she would take me and my cousins to the park to play, followed by trips to Burger King. When I turned 15 and obtained my driving learner’s permit, she was the only other person, aside from my father, who let me drive their vehicle. I never once even asked. She simply would give me her keys and have me chauffeur her and mom around town.

One of my most endearing memories of Tia was the time she gave me a pair of nice jeans for my birthday. About a week later I wore them for the first time and felt something strange in one of the front pockets. I reached in and pulled out a small plastic toy lizard. I thought for a moment, reached into the other pocket and sure enough, pulled out a second plastic toy lizard. What in the world? I later asked my mom about it and she absolutely cracks up. Apparently, Tia Gloria thought it would be fun to see if she could startle me. What has always made me smile about this story is the fact that I was in my twenties when she did this. Age was not a limiting factor in her rulebook.

I regret not spending more time with her these past few years. Due to the rush of everyday life, our conversations were short and much too far and few between. I always sent her flowers and gave her a call on her birthday… something I completely missed this past year. …and it hurts.

Tia Gloria, thanks for being the best aunt ever and for watching over my mom all these years. You were like a second mother to me and I’m really going to miss you. Love you always.

Build-A-Moment

Jamie — Sat, 20 Feb 2010 05:00:13 +0000

Snowy

Before leaving home, I asked Joel and Jake to make me a bear at Build-A-Bear at the mall. I wanted something to take with me, and I wanted the bear to have their voices. I ended up choosing a soft, white polar bear and Jake recorded a message for me to put inside. Joel tried to do it with him, but it was too loud in the store and sounded poor. Jake’s message – a very loud: “I love you mommy.” I have slept with that polar bear every night since I’ve been in Tampa – in the hospital and now in the apartment. I press the sound button in Snowy’s (the polar bear – I know, so creative) arm before going to sleep and although at times it makes me sad, it always makes me smile.

I had the idea to make the boys bears with a message from me. I think I had this thought because a few weeks ago, Joel told me that Jake cried because he missed me; it was really the first time we saw him realize my absence. He always knew I was gone but he’s young and went throughout his day; however, we believe time finally took it’s toll. All my ideas seem to be coming to me when I sleep and it just occurred to me one night that hearing my voice might help the boys deal with my absence. So last week, mom and I went to a mall and passed a Build-A-Bear and I did it. I made personal messages for Jake and Josh and stuffed them into two similar yet different bears. Jacob’s is called Cookie and Joshua’s is Brownie – I think I was hungry when I made them! I told Joel and we decided to give them to the boys during their Valentine’s Day visit.

Cookie (for Jacob) & Brownie (for Joshua)

I gave the boys their bear when they arrived late Friday afternoon. Jacob was not that thrilled; plus, my voice sounded muffled. It sounded fine in the store, but it was loud inside. We had a little boy behind us who literally screamed – just a high pitch scream for absolutely no reason at all. It actually gave me and mom a headache. Mom got Josh to giggle with his bear, and his message was completely clear. Before the boys left, I brought out the bears again and this time went better. Jacob even posed for a picture with the bear. Now, the bears are with the boys at home and hope the messages provide them some comfort.

Jacob with Cookie

Joshua with Brownie

A Valentine’s Weekend to Remember

Jamie — Tue, 16 Feb 2010 13:24:24 +0000

The boys are back in West Palm and, of course, I miss them. Luckily, our weekend together was memorable. The boys arrived late Friday afternoon, and we just hung out and had dinner together. I gave Jacob and Joshua teddy bears that I made at Build-A-Bear with message from me (expect a separate post on this); I can’t say Jacob was that thrilled but mom got Josh to giggle with his. Jacob did show more interest today before he left; he even posed for a picture with his bear for me.

On Saturday, mom and I made the boys Belgian waffles, which they seemed to like. Then Joel and I went to the flea market while mom watched the boys. It was fun just to be together; plus, I got to show Joel this shop with tiki’s. I bought one on a previous trip for Joel because it’s the theme Joel wants for our backyard pool area. Since he liked it, we got two more, but we still need more to decorate – maybe some tiki torches.

That night Joel and I went out to dinner at Red Lobster, which was decent. Busy, though. Apparently, we weren’t the only people who thought the 13th would be better than the 14th. Again, it was just nice to be out with Joel and spend time as a couple. Speaking of being a couple, this trip Joel slept in the same room as me. My room (as well as the guest room) has two single beds, so we were in the same room like it’s 1950, but I enjoyed not being alone. We watched some TV and said our good-night’s and love you’s which I had missed. I wake up quite often now, and what was great this weekend is that I could see Joel and listen to him breathe.

We also exchanged Valentine’s Saturday night via Joel’s request. The boys surprised me with a CD of pictures taken by a photographer (Dawn Yap) who used to work with him at the movie theater years ago. It’s amazing and so unexpected. I gave the boys their gifts too, but the boys’ gift still stands out. Here are a few of the pictures:

Didn’t Dawn do a wonderful job? They are beautiful.

Sunday morning we had waffles again because the boys liked them. We took Jacob to MOSI science museum and it was okay. We like some parts better than others. We had fun in the “Kids in Charge” exhibit because Jacob got to explore and manipulate.

Next, we went through a Da Vinci exhibit, but it was really more for adults. Jacob was not thrilled; the one exception was with the inventions. He actually knew that a sign with a hand that has a red circle around it with the line through it meant “No touch.” That’s literally what he told me. I was so proud. So he read me every sign, but I did have to explain when the sign changed and he was allowed to touch, which he loved. I only had to tell him once, and he totally knew the difference between both signs.

The rest of the museum wasn’t really impressive. There was Disasterville, and there were just too many loud noises. Jacob did not like it and the earthquake room we took him in made him seriously unhappy. There was an area about the human body, but for Jacob, it was more gross than anything. Plus, we kept finding things broken or just plain lame. Second to last, we watched an IMAX movie called “Under the Sea.” The only problem was that the film kept showing sea animals eating other sea animals in split seconds. It kept causing Jacob to jump and kept scaring him. I ended up holding him and later he sat on my lap, but I liked comforting him. The last thing we did was let Jacob play on a playground set that had numerous slides and he loved it.

Afterward, we went out to lunch and Jacob was actually really good. We took Jacob back to the apartment and then Joel and I went to Publix to buy some steak because Joel was going to cook for us, which he did even though he was starting to feel ill. Unfortunately, that continued and Joel ended up going to bed early and leaving pretty early Monday morning. Fortunately, we had time together before he felt sick. Joel went so far as to wear a duckbill mask around Monday morning because he didn’t want to infect me. It was a sad departure. Jacob kept saying he didn’t want to go, but then he seemed okay. Joel and I teared up, and little Josh has no clue but he sure is cute!

Charlie Brown heads BUT Josh has more hair!

Boo!

Happy 5th Birthday to Jake!

Joel — Tue, 09 Feb 2010 05:00:18 +0000

Five years ago, Jake entered our world and forever changed our lives. And although it’s only been five years, it’s sometimes hard to remember what our life was like before his arrival. One thing is for sure… there were definitely less toys laying around the house.

I enjoy playing with Jake, but I also enjoy watching him play. It reminds me of what it was like to be a child; the times spent playing with toy cars, or kicking the ball outside, blissfully unaware of the daily stress experienced by parents as they work to provide for their children. I watch him play and I sometimes find myself selfishly wishing he would stay a little boy; spending the rest of his days joyfully playing, completely innocent and unaware of life’s harsh realities.

The truth is he’s growing up, and we’re growing older. Today he’s 5, before we know it he’ll be 10, and soon thereafter he’ll enter the awkward teenage years where the grandparents are finally avenged. Yeah, I’m a bit worried about that.

For my part I plan to do what my father did with me and pass on the experiences he passed down to me, as well as the new ones I’ve obtained through my personal journey. As parents, I feel that’s one of the greatest gifts we can give our children.

Happy birthday Jacob! Mommy and Daddy love you!

Jake under 1 year (2005)

Jake at 1 year old (2006)

Jake at 2 years old (2007)

Jake at 3 years old (2008)

Jake at 4 years old (2009)

Jake and Sophia’s Birthday Party

Joel — Mon, 08 Feb 2010 17:00:55 +0000

This past Saturday we celebrated Jacob and Sophia’s birthdays (Sophia is Jake’s cousin). They’re birthdays are only one day apart and Jake is just a year older than Sophie, so this one was birthday #5 for Jake and #4 for Sophie.

Continuing with the themed birthday parties we’ve been doing for them, this year the theme was cowboy/cowgirl. The planning for this one goes back to October/November of last year. In fact, Jamie had purchased some western themed items, including a cowboy costume for Jake, prior to her leaving for Tampa. My nieces Amy and Alyssa (Amy is Sophie’s mom) really worked hard and frankly, outdid themselves with this one.

Jake had been counting down the days to this party and I heard some of the boys in his class were doing the same. They all had an absolute BLAST! We invited the boys from his class and Sophie invited the girls from hers. The weather was a little windy, but the sun was shining and the temperature was just right.

The girls had planned some fun activities for the kids with the potato sack race and gold rush being the most popular. Speaking of potato sack races… CHEATERS NEVER WIN! This is a lesson Jake learned when he ran instead of hop during the race. ….and it’s all captured on video for ever more.

After the party, we took turns riding the strangest contraption. Apparently, one of my niece’s coworkers heard we were having a western themed party, and insisted we borrow the…, well for a lack of a better work, horse bike?? Just check out the photos below and you’ll see what I mean. It was an interesting ride and great fun. So much so, we were able to get the grandparents to take it for a spin.

Overall, a very enjoyable day. Many thanks to Amy, Alyssa, and the entire Borges clan for putting it together. Alyssa was kind enough to record the event with my video camera so Jamie wouldn’t miss out. You can find the 25 minute video from the party below.

[See post to watch Flash video]