The Q Family Blog » Joshua

Daddy-less Weekend

Jamie — Tue, 18 May 2010 12:46:12 +0000

This past weekend Joel went to Miami for a photography workshop; he returned energized and appeared to have a productive and fun experience. While he was gone, Mommy, Jacob, and Grandma played. I left Joshua out because unfortunately he was pretty fussy all weekend. He had drainage issue (probably due to allegeries) and cried quite a bit. It wasn’t that bad, but he wasn’t the most fun child to be around. Jacob…. he got spoiled. I got him McDonald’s Saturday for lunch and even I partook for the first time in months. They were so busy; it had to be fresh. The fries were pretty good, but I can’t say it’s the greatest food. I think it tasted better in my fantasies. We also watched movies, did a craft, worked on his Bible verses and speech exercises, had pizza, ate ice cream… we did fun stuff. Jacob was good for most of the weekend, and only really frustrated me once when he wouldn’t do anything but was “bored.” In the end, it was a fun weekend but exhausting!

Project Night Night

Jamie — Thu, 06 May 2010 00:26:10 +0000

This passed weekend I had Jacob go through his stuffed animals with me. We made three piles: Jacob’s, Joshua’s, and donate. Jacob was actually pretty good, giving many of his stuffed animals to Joshua. Many were obviously for a baby while others surprised me. He definitely did not want to part with certain ones. I helped with the donate pile because most were stuffed animals that Jacob said were for Joshua, so I made the decision that this one or that one should be donated. We filled a small garbage bag and when mom saw it, she suggested that I find a local group that could really use them. I liked the idea and went looking on-line. It was more difficult than I thought. Most places want items that are new; however, I found a couple that accepted “gently used” stuffed animals. Several were out of state, but I found two relatively nearby. Mushy Mates in Ft. Lauderdale, which didn’t have too much on-line information, and Project Night Night that has a location in Boca Raton. I decided to go with Project Night Night, and after I talked to Joel about it, he said that he’d help out and drive me there in order to donate.

Project Night Night helps homeless children. Their goal is to provide comfort and sweet dreams. When a child leaves a shelter, Project Night Night gives the child a tote bag with a book, a cozy blanket and a comforting stuffed animal. They believe that items such as these help with emotional trauma and overall well-being.

I’m posting this because Joel and I won’t be making our donation trip for a little while (end of the month or may even June) and I wanted to offer to take stuffed animals, blankets, and/or children’s books with ours. To find out more details, go to www.projectnightnight.org. I would love to bring a large donation. In fact, I went through the boys’ books and found a few, and I thought that maybe I might make a blanket. The website has the type of items that can be donated, including details about how the stuffed animals can’t make noises or have battery compartments, etc. You can bring your donation to me or may be we can work something out where I come to you.

Completed Homemade Door Signs

Jamie — Mon, 03 May 2010 05:01:21 +0000

I’ve been working on special door signs for Jacob and Joshua’s rooms since my time in the Tampa apartment. I had hoped to finish them before leaving – nope. Then, I wanted to get them done by Easter – nope. But this last Friday, completion and I think they look great. They’re the most detailed items that I’ve made out of plastic canvas. I think my characters and animals look really good. It was incredibly time consuming, but I am definitely pleased. Plus, I think they mounted well on the doors. It’s a great personal touch to their rooms, and I made it so I can change out the pictures and because the main characters hang, I can change them by making new ones as the boys get older.

As a bonus, Jacob seemed to like his sign when he got home from school. That made me a proud mommy.

Build-A-Moment

Jamie — Sat, 20 Feb 2010 05:00:13 +0000

Snowy

Before leaving home, I asked Joel and Jake to make me a bear at Build-A-Bear at the mall. I wanted something to take with me, and I wanted the bear to have their voices. I ended up choosing a soft, white polar bear and Jake recorded a message for me to put inside. Joel tried to do it with him, but it was too loud in the store and sounded poor. Jake’s message – a very loud: “I love you mommy.” I have slept with that polar bear every night since I’ve been in Tampa – in the hospital and now in the apartment. I press the sound button in Snowy’s (the polar bear – I know, so creative) arm before going to sleep and although at times it makes me sad, it always makes me smile.

I had the idea to make the boys bears with a message from me. I think I had this thought because a few weeks ago, Joel told me that Jake cried because he missed me; it was really the first time we saw him realize my absence. He always knew I was gone but he’s young and went throughout his day; however, we believe time finally took it’s toll. All my ideas seem to be coming to me when I sleep and it just occurred to me one night that hearing my voice might help the boys deal with my absence. So last week, mom and I went to a mall and passed a Build-A-Bear and I did it. I made personal messages for Jake and Josh and stuffed them into two similar yet different bears. Jacob’s is called Cookie and Joshua’s is Brownie – I think I was hungry when I made them! I told Joel and we decided to give them to the boys during their Valentine’s Day visit.

Cookie (for Jacob) & Brownie (for Joshua)

I gave the boys their bear when they arrived late Friday afternoon. Jacob was not that thrilled; plus, my voice sounded muffled. It sounded fine in the store, but it was loud inside. We had a little boy behind us who literally screamed – just a high pitch scream for absolutely no reason at all. It actually gave me and mom a headache. Mom got Josh to giggle with his bear, and his message was completely clear. Before the boys left, I brought out the bears again and this time went better. Jacob even posed for a picture with the bear. Now, the bears are with the boys at home and hope the messages provide them some comfort.

Jacob with Cookie

Joshua with Brownie

A Valentine’s Weekend to Remember

Jamie — Tue, 16 Feb 2010 13:24:24 +0000

The boys are back in West Palm and, of course, I miss them. Luckily, our weekend together was memorable. The boys arrived late Friday afternoon, and we just hung out and had dinner together. I gave Jacob and Joshua teddy bears that I made at Build-A-Bear with message from me (expect a separate post on this); I can’t say Jacob was that thrilled but mom got Josh to giggle with his. Jacob did show more interest today before he left; he even posed for a picture with his bear for me.

On Saturday, mom and I made the boys Belgian waffles, which they seemed to like. Then Joel and I went to the flea market while mom watched the boys. It was fun just to be together; plus, I got to show Joel this shop with tiki’s. I bought one on a previous trip for Joel because it’s the theme Joel wants for our backyard pool area. Since he liked it, we got two more, but we still need more to decorate – maybe some tiki torches.

That night Joel and I went out to dinner at Red Lobster, which was decent. Busy, though. Apparently, we weren’t the only people who thought the 13th would be better than the 14th. Again, it was just nice to be out with Joel and spend time as a couple. Speaking of being a couple, this trip Joel slept in the same room as me. My room (as well as the guest room) has two single beds, so we were in the same room like it’s 1950, but I enjoyed not being alone. We watched some TV and said our good-night’s and love you’s which I had missed. I wake up quite often now, and what was great this weekend is that I could see Joel and listen to him breathe.

We also exchanged Valentine’s Saturday night via Joel’s request. The boys surprised me with a CD of pictures taken by a photographer (Dawn Yap) who used to work with him at the movie theater years ago. It’s amazing and so unexpected. I gave the boys their gifts too, but the boys’ gift still stands out. Here are a few of the pictures:

Didn’t Dawn do a wonderful job? They are beautiful.

Sunday morning we had waffles again because the boys liked them. We took Jacob to MOSI science museum and it was okay. We like some parts better than others. We had fun in the “Kids in Charge” exhibit because Jacob got to explore and manipulate.

Next, we went through a Da Vinci exhibit, but it was really more for adults. Jacob was not thrilled; the one exception was with the inventions. He actually knew that a sign with a hand that has a red circle around it with the line through it meant “No touch.” That’s literally what he told me. I was so proud. So he read me every sign, but I did have to explain when the sign changed and he was allowed to touch, which he loved. I only had to tell him once, and he totally knew the difference between both signs.

The rest of the museum wasn’t really impressive. There was Disasterville, and there were just too many loud noises. Jacob did not like it and the earthquake room we took him in made him seriously unhappy. There was an area about the human body, but for Jacob, it was more gross than anything. Plus, we kept finding things broken or just plain lame. Second to last, we watched an IMAX movie called “Under the Sea.” The only problem was that the film kept showing sea animals eating other sea animals in split seconds. It kept causing Jacob to jump and kept scaring him. I ended up holding him and later he sat on my lap, but I liked comforting him. The last thing we did was let Jacob play on a playground set that had numerous slides and he loved it.

Afterward, we went out to lunch and Jacob was actually really good. We took Jacob back to the apartment and then Joel and I went to Publix to buy some steak because Joel was going to cook for us, which he did even though he was starting to feel ill. Unfortunately, that continued and Joel ended up going to bed early and leaving pretty early Monday morning. Fortunately, we had time together before he felt sick. Joel went so far as to wear a duckbill mask around Monday morning because he didn’t want to infect me. It was a sad departure. Jacob kept saying he didn’t want to go, but then he seemed okay. Joel and I teared up, and little Josh has no clue but he sure is cute!

Charlie Brown heads BUT Josh has more hair!

Boo!

Joshua’s First Tooth!

Joel — Sun, 07 Feb 2010 15:56:35 +0000

It’s been a while coming, but here it is: Joshua’s first tooth! There are actually two bottom teeth working their way through, but one has finally poked out from his gums.

It’s been quite challenging to snap a photo of it and had become somewhat of a quest for me over the past week. I got close a few times, but he loves to hide it under his tongue.

One down, twenty 19 to go. Now where did I leave that infant Tylenol?

Little Scarface

Joel — Tue, 02 Feb 2010 17:00:40 +0000

Jamie is an extremely organized individual. She makes lists for just about anything we do. Going to the store? List. Going on a trip? That’s a list. Kid’s birthday party coming up? You betcha there’s going to be a list involved. So when the time came to start getting things ready for her stay over in Tampa, there were lists everywhere. Not surprising, there was one for me too and prior to leaving, I was handed a notebook.

No, the entire notebook wasn’t full of lists…. only the first three pages. Still it must have been awesome to see my face when she handed it to me.

Most of the list items dealt with Christmas and other minor odds and ends. However, item 12 on page 3 was one she STRESSED could not be overlooked. It reads:

Clip Josh/ Jake’s finger & toe nails at least once a week.

So every week I set some time aside to clip their nails. I mean, I literally put a weekly alert on my calendar to remind me to do this.

With the exception that I had totally neglected their toes and Jake had some gnarly toenails when we visited Jamie a few weeks ago, I had done what I felt was a fair job staying on top of their finger nails. Still, the toe nail incident had kind of placed me on notice. I certainly didn’t want her thinking I wasn’t taking proper care of our kids.

Then it happened.

I’m over at my mom’s house having dinner and Joshua goes into one of his notorious fits of rage during which time he manages to put a nice gouge across his right cheek and draw blood. I had trimmed his nails the evening before and had no idea how he managed to do it, yet there it was.

My mom had the typical parental response: “Oh no, he hurt himself. Poor little guy.” Me? I think my first thought was “Jamie is going to KILL me” and my first words were “why did YOU let him do that?” Is this kid trying to get me in trouble? Fortunately, after the initial shock passed, I realized the scratch would probably be gone by the time Jamie saw him again. I was probably in the clear.

No such luck.

The very next day I receive a text message from Jamie saying she wants to do a video call on Skype. Bear in mind that we haven’t “skyped” since she was in the hospital.

I am so dead.

So that evening I call her on Skype and we chat for a while. Jake gets his turn as well and eventually Jamie asks to see Joshua. I bring him over to the camera and sit him in my lap. Maybe the scratch wouldn’t be noticeable through the webcam? The picture quality from my en couldn’t be that good, could it?

I’m sure you’ve heard the saying “you get what you pay for?” Well, apparently I paid too much.

The first thing Jamie says: “Ouch! He scratched himself good.” I immediately respond with “I swear I just cut his nails two days ago and have no idea how he managed to do that!”

In what felt like an eternity, she paused, gave me that strange head cocked to one side – squinty eye look she does when she doesn’t quite believe something, and just said “ok”.

She knows I’m trying my best. I love you, Jamie!

Joshua’s New Nickname: Charlie

Jamie — Sun, 24 Jan 2010 21:18:28 +0000

Something I noticed when the boys visited last weekend was that from behind Joshua really looks like Charlie Brown. His head is wide with the ears sticking out just right. It’s adorable! Joel and I tried looking for Charlie Brown’s trademark yellow zig-zag pattern shirt, but we didn’t have a lot of luck; they exist, but unfortunately none were small enough for him.

If by chance anyone sees one, let us know where.

Brotherly Love

Joel — Sun, 10 Jan 2010 01:59:17 +0000

When Joshua was first born, Jake wanted nothing to do with him. We would tell him: “Jake, you’re a big brother now” to which he would reply “I’m not a big brother, I’m Jacob!”. His jealousy was so obvious, you would almost purposefully pick up Joshua just to watch Jake drop whatever he was doing and come over to dance for you.

Fast forward 5 months and he’s totally assumed the role of big brother; I’m so proud of him. Ever since mommy left for Tampa, he’s stepped up and has become quite the helper. Not only will he go out of his way to spend time with Joshua, but he tends to his little brother whenever he’s crying, whether I ask him or not. I’ve caught him on multiple occasions giving Joshua his binky, singing lullabys, talking to him, and dancing (what can I say, he loves to dance). He’s successful at calming his little brother down about 90% of the time. Joshua will usually quiet down and just stare at Jake. I guess the question is: does he dig what Jake is doing, or does he think he’s just plain crazy?

Regardless, it warms my heart watching them interact and it’s become a source of strength for me. Even in the midst of our present troubles, we truly have been blessed. I know times will come when they won’t get along so well, but my hope and prayer is that they both are able to enjoy a close sibling relationship as adults.

Early Christmas

Jamie — Sun, 06 Dec 2009 14:04:33 +0000

Yesterday we celebrated a mini-Christmas. We allowed Jacob to open a couple gifts early. Joshua too. Plus us and mom. Jake just had to open everyone’s presents but we encouraged it. We got a few good pictures and both boys seemed happy. Joel got me a digital picture frame to take to Moffitt and he spent a good deal of the night loading pictures on it. After presents, we did my traditional Christmas breakfast, courtesy of mom. The rest of the day flew by, and the quick passing of time got to me for a little while and made me sad. But Joel intervened and we spent quality time together. Jake was supposed to sing his school’s annual Christmas walk tonight, but it was looking as though it might rain and we didn’t want anyone getting sick this close to my procedure so we didn’t end up going. Later it cleared up and Joel surprised us by taking us Christmas light driving. The Christmas light drive is always something that I love to do at the holidays, and knowing it, Joel wanted to go early. I really appreciated the gesture even though we discovered fewer lights lit than expected.

Tomorrow I leave for Tampa, and although it saddens me, I’m trying to remain positive that this is the final step of my recovery. I am thankful for all the prayers and good thoughts that people have continuously been sending my way. I feel incredibly blessed.